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It’s funny when you see job postings for where you work. I saw one for where I’m at (a ghost job, since there’s a hiring freeze) that said like “join a highly functional team”. Lady, this team can barely push code that doesn’t have syntax errors.
Side note: posting jobs with no intention to hire (aka a ghost job) should be illegal.
I had a recruiter call me up and ask me how I hadn’t found a job with all these postings. Like, lady, they’re not real!
Recently saw the place I left a year ago put up a posting. It was word-for-word the same as the job I applied for 4 years previously but it had an extra sentence: MUST HAVE A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOUR.
This is code for: MUST BE OKAY WITH THE OWNER’S RAMPANT HOMO AND TRANS PHOBIA.
not remotely
“Oh good because we don’t allow work-from-home. Can’t miss out on that in-person SYNERGY.”
Translation: we hired incompetent insecure assholes into management positions and can’t get rid of them for some reason, can you tolerate their bullshit and manage their egos
or the classic “we wanted to downsize the employee budget to pad the CEOs salary, so we fired half our staff and the remaining plebs do twice the work because fuck you thats why”
From a surveyors experience, replace ‘we’ with ‘they’ and continue as before.
“We’re a family company”
=> some of the worst backstabbing I’ve ever seen. Glad to have left that behind.
We’re just like a family.
Any time there’s an emergency, day or night, you’re supposed immediately to drop everything to take care of us and demand nothing in return.
And of course, we’re not going to pay any of that overtime!
We’re a family! Complete with the narcissistic micromanaging lunatics, Favoritism and nepotism, and miserable people willing to throw you under the bus for a chance to be rewarded!
Same here! “We’re a family”. It was an abusive relationship where the CEO was the narcissistic abuser. God he treated everyone like crap in that place.
“Do you want to be an infinitely productive profit maker for the company at your own expense?”
Give it your 110% and we’ll demand 120%!
And don’t think that 120% will grant you a raise either! Inflation will eat 5% of your paycheck each year!
You’re lucky if it’s only 5% in this economy!
Job postings should not make the job sound overly appealing. They should give you an idea of if it would be a good fit for you as a potential applicant.
How else will the HR attract applicants?
I see the same job market terminology hasn’t changed generationally.
Tell me, are 21 year olds still meeting the challenge to “thrive under pressure” for $10 an hour more than their fast food friends?
No, now it’s only $3.50 a hour more than a fast food job with unpaid overtime.
Pay off their
tertiary educationTP in no time, then
“I can make a hundred trillion calculation per second and they’re all wrong”
Well if that’s the bar I can do 150 trillion wrong calculations!
Beaten by math! My only weakness!!
Do you want to pay me like i’m in a fast paced break everything environment where i’m going have to put up with a lot of shit?
Oh GOD no
Just sayin, i don’t love break-neck pace, but I do love living comfortably during inflation…
Come work in our suicide factory!
nO 1 wAnTs 2 wOrK nE mOaR!!!1!11!1
Stopped reading at “Do you want to work”
(well, at least not for money)
Damn! You must be wealthy!
Let’s work towards not working at all! Crazy as it sounds.
I have a plan, it’s stupid good!
But they want to hire the idiots who do.
Yeah like srsly? Do you want to pay me a king’s ransom?
