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Run?
Join in the singing but replace the word “you” with the word “me”.
This is the actual correct answer, no?
Smile and wave boys, smile and wave
Smile and look around at all the people who want to celebrate you, and muse on how fortunate you are to have them in your life.
What are you, some kind of normie?
Smile creepily and make direct and awkward eye contact?
Yes, but with one person in particular.
Yeah, or you can even just smile and fake it.
For anyone out there who has problems with things like this, remember, you can always just observe what other people do in the same situation, and then do the same thing when it happens to you. This is basically what other people intuitively do, but not everyone has the same sort of intuition.
This but creepier
Mis-reply. Ignore this.
Stare at the candles until they burn a hole in your retina
Please sir, tell me why
My life’s so pitiful, but the future’s so bright?
Well I’d look ahead, but it burns my retinas…
Grin and bear it
Masturbate furiously. The goal is to finish when the song ends.
Penis helicopter at finish
Makes me think of that hippo pooping except with cum.
This is why I’m banned from Applebees.
You and I have very different ideas of what an Applebee’s are for.
The cake needed a little more icing anyway.
Like your style
I could never last that long.
I know… All those relatives right in front of you!
You haven’t met my relatives…
Well that’s just the icing on the cake
Panic.
I usually just screech loudly until it’s over or the restaurant staff come over to intervene
Hand out cigars
This is the greatest comment section ever
Sigh loudly, roll eyes, scowl judgementally,
…just like Mom.
unzip
Bathe in the adulation, absorb their hymn of worship like the shining golden god you are. To thine own self be true! Happy Birthday = Hail Satan
