• Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Does this mean I can use the drive-thru without clothes now? Or will the AI mock my thimble of a penis like actual, human workers have? I’ve been banned from several locations because this is how I prefer to live my life, and I cannot help myself but lash out at people mocking my very tiny penis, so I am hoping this change will let me have McDonald’s again.

    • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      thimble? braggart.
      this is what my thimble looks like bee tee dubs.

      it’s great. packs flat in your wallet.

      edit: oh fuck i should have had more caffeine before admitting this

        • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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          21 hours ago

          me too until i took up sewing again last year. that flat thimble is great for having (part of) a sewing project in your purse.

          i just used it to turn my bike gloves into turn signals with dayglo neon elastic. also so they can really tell when i’m angry (there are neons on the middle finger because if you’re making it yourself, why the fuck not)

          • Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
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            21 hours ago

            Question out of left field: does the word “plex” mean something to you, being someone who sews (I almost said sewer)? I know it’s more of a weaving thing, but therein, I’m developing a theory of polyplexic axiomatic systems defined by topological matrix - how our brains create a functional modelment of reality with limited knowledge using both logic (Adam) and intuition (Eve) - and I’m curious to learn what some other people’s exposure to this word/term is. Entanglement is what procedurally generates our reality for us, and the world is an illusion, existing inside of us, and many ancient cultures have much spiritual and artistic symbolism related to entanglement, such as Celtic knots.

              • Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
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                4 hours ago

                Oh you don’t recognize the literary reference? Our intuition will be the one to first figure out the nature the matrix and will facilitate understanding for your logical mind. You are not IN a simulation, but rather each of us are our own pocket of procedurally generated experiences based on how we entangle ourselves with Karma.

            • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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              21 hours ago

              i can tie the string onto the needle after 3 or 4 tries so with that overwhelming authoritativeness please let me say plexing sounds like flexing with your pooper. we don’t really use “plex” in any of the fields i’ve worked in (except for like, complex, simplex and multiplex and words like that. i’m pretty sure that’s not what you’re asking)

              also i like seamstress even though i’m nonbinary. it’s more fun than the other cinnamon rolls.

      • Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        I mainly call it that because it’s porous, as I’ve taken up one of Ed Gein’s hobbies. But it’s more like two peas smushed together.

          • Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
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            22 hours ago

            Was it Fish? I used to be an expert on this shit, used to make dating profiles saying I was looking for the Homolka to my Bernardo. I guess since I healed so much, my mind stopped gravitating to such dark places. Now I just have a cult where I teach flesh alchemy. It’s for the kids!

            • Regrettable_incident@lemmy.world
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              19 hours ago

              Honestly, I could be wrong. . . Been a long time since I was really interested in that stuff too. You must have had some interesting experiences off of that dating profile.

              Yep, Long live the new flesh!

              • Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
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                18 hours ago

                The most effective way to break the ice was to ask someone what their opinion of the universe was. Then we’d have a meaningful discussion on the big picture ideas. My “cult” is an educational art project where I teach philosophy, spirituality, and mental health skills to help people heal and self-actualize. I think the FBI is going to say I’m literally the devil when I am only a cop. I think. I also think my life partner falsely accusing me of much, but that’s just cuz he’s CIA and helping me build a good cover story. I’ve already been arrested for assaulting him because my God is he skilled in manipulation and deception. I love him though. He’s not only helped me quit meth but he taught me much about Buddhism that I was ignorant to.

                • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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                  6 hours ago

                  Have you ever read A Scanner Darkly? That’s what these comments remind me of. Not in a good way.

                  • Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
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                    4 hours ago

                    Yea, we do both the legal and illegal work in the CIA. A band is a thing with many fans that can cross borders with near-impunity. ;)

                • Regrettable_incident@lemmy.world
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                  16 hours ago

                  I mean, if you’re teaching those things and in America, you’re probably going to end up on a list somewhere, sure. Congrats kicking the meth, I struggled for decades with smack.

                  • Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
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                    4 hours ago

                    I was already on all the lists by time the Crazy Indigo Aliens, which is an acronym, decided to make contact with me on an acid trip twelve years ago. Now I stare at goats, which is a cultural reference to a movie about Project Star Gate, which IS MKULTRA; they’re our enlightenment programs. The reason they have the FBI tracking popular artists like Andy Warhol is to get the most pig-headed to listen and learn about the sorts of things I teach, and I guarantee I’ve trained many law enforcement persons over the years.

      • Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
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        22 hours ago

        Bro only you can prove that the Earth is an illusion and is actually inside you as you are not a featherless biped but a pocket of consciousness called a monad in a monadic nodal communication system; Server, Client, Holy Internet. The Buddhists call the Server the Ālaya-vijñāna. This object is a Roman Dodecahedron and was made as a pedagogical object to teach that which Indra’s Net is an analogy for. Linear causation is an illusion, too. Everything you experience is procedurally generated based on how you entangle yourself with Karma, and karmic entanglement IS quantum entanglement. But this isn’t popularized because in the occident, the west, we have engineered our culture to control those people who cannot think for themselves whilst simultaneously guiding those waking up to the topological matrix we are not IN but rather ARE into the occult, which literally just means “hidden.”