We’re academic oriented American parents, so our instinct is to encourage academic success.
Honestly, the Dutch schools just feel less bureaucratic? I think that plays a big role, too. In American schools, kids feel like a car on an assembly line. Any exceptions or personalization along the way are treated with lota of paperwork and suspicion. The Dutch schools seem to treat kids like… kids? Human beings with individual character. It’s refreshing.
I moved to the Netherlands with my family last year. In the US, he would have entered middle school this year. He was becoming angsty, screen focused (no matter the limits and supervision), and resentful. Not a lot, but hints of it.
Now, it feels like he received a longer runway on childhood. The angst has diminished (mostly), he has physical freedom to bike wherever he wants (and he does so!). Part of it might be an adversity thing - he realizes the things he used to complain about seem childish compared to the challenges he has now as an immigrant. I’m not sure. The schools seem a lot more chill - they make a point not to tell when standardized tests are occurring “to not give stress to the children”. Kids are expected to be more independent, and most rise to the occasion to take advantage of that freedom. The school insisted that by my son’s age, the students should be bringing themselves to school alone after the first couple weeks, for example. The helicopter parenting behavior that is normal and encouraged in the US simply doesn’t exist here. The school connects families to after school activities, and pays for them if the family cannot, to ensure all children get the same advantages in life. Swimming certification is mandatory (which makes sense with all of the water everywhere), which gives parents the confidence to know their kid is safe when out on their own.
I credit a lot of it to physical safety - streets in residential and non-highway areas prioritize slow cars, intentional design elements around liveability, and discourages cars for short trips which means that everyone in society is a pedestrian or cyclist sometimes, and so treat their fellow human as a human and not an obstacle in their GTA race.
Also, the school culture tends to lend itself to an attitude of, “why go for an A when a C is passing?” Be efficient. Don’t put in more effort than necessary. Enjoy your life. Kids still learn, they still achieve, but it’s not treated like a competition or an arms race, and parents who do are treated like psychopaths.
Nothing of value was lost.
This is the Europe community
Most people prefer what they’re already familiar with, especially when they’ve never experienced anything different.
Not much of a revelation.