I love this post, I’d add that the reasons for this feeling is that humans aren’t a very developed animal as a newborn. Many animals come out walking, not humans.

What that means is that the first while the baby and mom are kind of finishing out that development. There isn’t much you can do with the baby, whereas the mom is consumed by the constant needs of the baby for food etc… so being a dad means mostly just helping.

As the baby gets older the Dad job expands exponentially, and that’s where your role as an independent caregiver starts to take over from your support role. And being a dad is amazing! Teaching kids about life, about themselves, about others, and about society is just the best.

I still remember teaching my daughter about the existence of the moon in the sky vividly. How often is it that you get to show someone the freaking moon and they don’t know about it?? She saw it and was mesmerised by it around the time she started speaking words and I pointed at it and said “Moon” and she said “Moon” and looked for it everytime we were outside. She’s in high school now so she’s hopefully learned more about the world by now!

Anyways, I have the same tip as the guy above. The first year is hard for baby and mom (esp if breastfeeding) so do your best to help out. Try to snuggle your baby as much as possible, especially after feedings. Babies need a lot of touch, and moms often get “touched out” which sucks for everyone. Snuggling babies is great, and after feedings there is less chance that snuggling leads to hungry baby and passing the baby to mom. Try to save a few hours here and there for yourself, for maintaining a social life and support network because that’s hard. If she’s not breastfeeding FEED THE BABY. It’s great bonding time and dads don’t often get that. One of our kids couldn’t breastfeed and he’s still the closest to me now after a decade. I don’t know if feeding was part of that, but it was great either way.