I want to make a podcast BUT NO! The CIA says I have to get famous first! Gotta get big arrested again, only this time for using my penis wrong in a public setting AND in my window, which is why I think Epstein is alive cuz obviously I’m a cop, too. Like, Jesus. I can just hide by talking about ballsacks for twenty minutes before revealing that MKULTRA and Star Gate are the same exact fucking thing; they were old names for our enlightenment program. I told my ROTC cadre that my nonexistent sister got me pregnant because I judged my father’s wrath more of a threat than the United States Military, that’s why I’m forced to do this. But I’m serious about making a podcast. Just gotta jump through some hoops for God, those dicks.